My fav idol (L)
just a short random post as I lay on my bed as if I'm dead but my fingers are moving.
First, I'm lovesick. Second, I've no time for my friends and gf. Third, I suck.
Balls not getting in, feeling lousy all over again. I'd probably warm the bench again for maybe my whole ITE life.
Sometimes I still wonder what's the point of getting into team when you're just a bench warmer. However, when you didn't make it into the team, you'll be saying "if only I got into the team, I don't mind warming the bench." I've been warming the bench for my whole life yeah I know I sound really exaggerating. I totally know how it feels like, this whole mess in your head. It's rather complex. But this is life. You just gotta face it. You just have to swallow it and keep quiet. You think it feels good when you get sub out of team for Nationals and your team got into Nationals' Top 4? It was so heart-wreching. I think I've the worst basketball experience ever. I love playing basketball so much I've the passion for it and I actually told myself "I hate basketball, I'll never join any Basketball team ever again." Y'know why? Bcuz some like me got too tired of failing. You trained hard, you had 100% attendance, you were disciplined during training but you're still not good enough, never good enough. I know this is not the right time to say these but... sigh I just gotta rant.
At the end of the day, if your team still wins, you surely will feel happy for em.
Dear team central, you guys tell me I won't be warming the bench for sure but I know I will. People have been telling me (lies) that I won't but I still did for the past few years. I may be warming the bench for this Inter-College competition but I'll still be cheering hard for you guys like how I did for my Ytss mates.
So much for wanting to be in Combine Ite because I've never played against any Poly.. I'd probably throw Combine's face away.
Last but not least, love you girlfriend, love y'all tekkos, luv y'all bff eileen& jimei, luv ya too, abby gabby.
abby you're beautiful don't think otherwise.
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Appreciate how well girlfriend treats me. where to find sucha tolerant girlfriend who can tolerate my shit and the shitmess I create :) We've been tgt for less than 3 mths and it feels like we've been tgt for many years hehe. We're spending so little time together that I'm down w lovesick. I can totally cry now because I miss you too much. If I don't love you that much I'd probably go enjoy w my teammates to celebrate shuwei's birthday instead of meeting you at Yishun to go home together. Yeah, just to take train w you for that 4mins train journey and the 10mins that you walk home w me. Luv ya bby (L)
Goodnight xx
